Filed under: BBC, Big Brother, Channel 4, Euro 2008, ITV, Match of the Day: Euro 2008, Russell Grant's Postcards | Tags: Alex, BBC1, Big Brother, Channel 4, Euro 2008, Gordon Strachan, ITV, Match of the Day, Ronaldo, Scolari
Following on from the Big Brother drinking game, here’s an Alex-specific version that you can all play along with at home. All you need to do is take a swig of your chosen tipple every time this year’s favourite anger management candidate utters any of the following phrases:
- “I’m not trying to be funny, but…”
- “Do you know what I mean?”
- “Remember I told you.”
- “My fings.”
- “Deal with it.”
Alternatively, if you’re more likely to be spending your evenings watching the far more civilised Euro 2008, you can still play along. All you need to do is take a sizable gulp every time any of the commentators or pundits mention any of the following:
- The home nations’ failure to qualify.
- Ronaldo.
- The Alps.
- The Premier League.
- Dutch “total football”.
- Scolari’s going to Chelsea, don’tcha know.
By the way, what is the point of the current trend of cutting from the presenter and pundits in the studio, to a different presenter standing on the touchline with a different pundit? Does the touchline pundit know something that the others don’t? And, if so, why can’t they just let him sit in the studio with the rest of them? Of course, it’s understandable in situations where the touchline pundit is Gordon Strachan, because clearly nobody can bear to be in a room with him for any significant period of time. But what of the others? Answers, as usual please, on the back of one of Russell Grant’s Postcards.
Whether it’s CSI: Miami, CSI: NY or just plain old generic CSI, they all have one thing in common: they’re shit. They could bring out a new addition to the franchise called CSI: Uranus for all I care. It would still be plopsy. Here’s some footage of David “Rubbish” Caruso, which could only too easily be used as Exhibit A in the case arguing that every single episode is exactly the bloomin’ same.
Filed under: BBC, Extraordinary People, Five, Heroes | Tags: Batman, BBC, Dawson's Creek, Extraordinary People, Five, Hayden Panettiere, Heroes, Supergirl, Superman
Heroes. It’s a bit like Five’s Extraordinary People, only less imaginative. In Five-speak, there’s ‘The Chubby Policeman Who Reads Minds’, ‘The Mexican Woman with Black Stuff Coming Out of Her Eyes’ and, spotted on BBC Three’s sneak peek edition last night, ‘The Girl Who’s Quite Good at Skipping and That’.
Yup, they’re a talented bunch and no mistaking. But is it just me, or has Season 2 of the Beeb’s big-budget import never really – erm – taken flight? None of them ever seem to actually do anything. Take retired cheerleader Claire (Hayden Panettiere) as a case in point. These days she’s less like Supergirl and more like some sort of lapsed Dawson’s Creek character, all whiney teen angst and no trousers.
Hopefully something – and by something, I mean anything – will happen soon to perk things up a bit. Until then though, it seems Superman, Batman and ‘The Boys Joined at the Head’ have got little to worry about.
Filed under: Extraordinary People, Five, Russell Grant's Postcards | Tags: Extraordinary People, Five, Russell Grant's Postcards
Following on from my recent(ish) bout of poetry dedicated to the Half Man Half Tree episode of Five’s Extraordinary People, here’s a little game you can all play at home with granny and the kids. Below are some genuine episode titles from the show, along with some that I’ve made up – but which is which? Answers on the back of one of Russell Grant’s Postcards, please…
Filed under: Extraordinary People, Five | Tags: Extraordinary People, Five, poetry
There’s a man on Five who’s made from trees,
Tune in quick, before he leaves.
